I know I just posted my thoughts on Infinite Jest,,,

I couldn't decide if that should be followed by "but" or "so".

I know I just posted my thoughts on Infinite Jest, BUT I did a lot more reading and I have some thoughts and questions.

1) I felt funny about the chronology; years are labelled in a strange way (for example, The Year of the Trial Sized Dove Bar) and I wasn't sure WHEN things were happening. It was getting disorienting. I decided to trust Wallace as I had been instructed to, and when I got to endnote #24 it had worked itself out. Because Endnote #24 sort of lays out the (INSANELY LONG) chronology of James Incandenza's film-making history and uses the weird year labels.

2) Endnote #39, part a is freaking hilarious. Ha! "Les Assassins des Fauteuils Rollents, a.k.a. Wheelchair Assassins, pretty much Quebec's most dreaded [...] terrorist cell".


3) The similarities between IJ and The Royal Tenenbaums seems to be coincidental.

I will tell you about other things, too.

1) I'm still mostly eating crazy-healthy. I have re-introduced more variety, but still being pretty restrictive for the sake of getting fit and I think (fingers crossed) I'm making some progress. For fuck's sake, I hope I'm making progress.

2) One of the two hens got out when Conner was putting fresh water inside the coop the other day (or so I hear) and Sugar chased the poor thing for hours. It hid under Harry's house for the night and hasn't laid an egg since the ordeal.

3) Sewing a LOT. A lot of diaper covers. Hey- need any diaper covers??

So...who else is doing the Infinite Summer? you there, in the back?

I want so much to discuss the first couple of parts of Infinite Jest w/ someone! Instead, I'll have to satisfy myself with telling you my own personal news:

So, I have a date on Sunday with this guy who's smart, funny, etc and it turns out he also Colombian. Wow, cool, I thought.

Turns out he was in my middle school gifted class w/ Mrs. Silos. Ha! Last night we reminisced: Remember when we had to memorized that poem by Percy Bysshe Shelley?? Remember when we mummified that chicken??? Haha!

Ans speaking of chickens... I secured 2 free range laying hens and a chicken coop for my kids today. For free. Just like that! Someone needed to get rid of them by Thursday.

Sweeeet. I love free stuff, even better when it's delicious free stuff.

trying to head this off at the pass

I really want to be more zen, and instead I am stressing and lame.

Maybe it's post-wedding blues? Maybe it's from drinking a lot?

I cried at the ceremony when (the insanely gorgeous) Simon Tetelbaum started things off with the kindest words ever spoken. I cried when Mr. Gus spoke up and said that he and and his wife "give this woman away".




I shed a tear when John and Laurie danced their first dance, and then later on, I cried when I accidentally texted Tom my ex, when I had intended to text Helen. That was actually really really not good. I was fairly drunk by then, being who knows how many glasses in to John's rad punch and a few glasses of champagne and white wine as well. But it was mostly happy crying.

This is the level of merriment we are talking about: There was blood on the dancefloor at one point (before anyone had dropped a champagne glass), and we were just like "everyone ok?? alright, party on!".

By 3 am there were tuxedo shirts and dresses strewn here and there all over the deck. Folks hit the hot tub, pool, and The Gulf of Mexico armed with nothing but full bottles and gallon size zip-lock baggies of leftover gourmet hors d'oeuvres.

Laurie (bride), James Wight (friend from the groom's side), and I closed the party out around 5 am on Sunday morning. We were talking art and philosophy until we finally fell asleep in the living room (minus Laurie, lol) of this incredible beach house... however I was awoken twice between then and 8 am.

The second time it actually involved me. I just had to go move my car a few feet so someone could get out. That should be really simple (right??), and grabbed my keys, and dashed out barefooted, and still in my sexy floor length black dress.

NOTE: I left the gate of the beach house ajar so that I could get back in and go back to sleep as soon as I was done. Sleep deprived, yes. Stupid, no.

And then, while I was in my car, someone else came out and slammed the gate shut. Seriously. I thought about climbing over the (sharp metal) gate, except I was in the gown and had no underwear on (long story,but not what you think). So I had to go on a long walk to find a condo building that had a beach access gate unlocked. At 8 am. In a black floorlength gown.

Back to the couch. I wanted to sleep but then it was just a lost cause.

We found one person in a house of 20 occupants who had 4 Advil (worth their weight in GOLD) and went out for a stylish post wedding breakfast. All the while, I had on my bravest face, but inside I was slowly melting down.

Now, a whole day out (is that all?? geez) and I am marginally better.

I have to go pack, though. I'm leaving, on a jet plane, for another damn wedding.

"It's like, what is this? The Love Connection at 5:30 with Travis Short?"

Many funny things were said during study time today. That one (above) has got to take the cake, and I wish it'd been me that came up with that quip.

See, there are these two people in the front row, directly in front of me and to the left a bit, that have this nutty chemistry. They're always, like, poking each other with pencils and someone today said he's picked her up before to crack her back (???) and they just have this... vibe. It's hilarious, really, except they are both seeing other people, somewhat lackadaisically. I pretty much put money down that they get it together at the midnight hour, and go out after our final Tuesday night. Unlike Madonna in that movie where she's on a deserted island with her one true love?

I don't know, I've never seen that movie. I'm just talking.

I did, however, watch I'll Never Be Your Woman and Knocked Up over the past few days (due to cutie Paul Rudd being in them both).

fortune cookies

Hullo, just sitting here at work but I wanted to share this with you. I just got the most appropos fortune in my cookie:


"It's not the plan that is important, it's the planning"


That's EXACTLY right on for today. My fb status is all "serious choices, blah blah" today, too.

Oh, and the other side of my fortune told me how to say 'watermelon' in chinese and I WAS LITERALLY EATING WATERMELON right then. I wish I was eating chinese food, but hey. Poor planning, I guess?

I wanted there to be tiny rat guillotines in this title

But there was no better way to work that in, since I'm feeling pretty happy right now.

In the car, when it was 95 degrees and awful, I thought I'd title this one 'who knew tiny rat guillotines would be registering on the sexy-meter??' but I decided to let. it. go.

It's kind of a long tail, are you ready?


So, yesterday was completely devoted to getting that paper off the ground. I did as much as I could stand and then left for the beach. Stopped by the bf's house (his ACTUAL HOUSE folks: I think we are getting somewhere on this comes-with-the-wind kind of flakiness)to pick him up and then I pulled a bait an switch... He assumed we were just going to hang out on the beach near his house, but off we went to go meet up with some people I know (mostly friends of Cousin Sean and Kandice). It was awkward because of some odd drama Billy was privy to regarding CrazyBob (Billy's totally whack 60 yo roommate) and his estranged brother who, it turns out, is the father of one of my acquaintances, and was in attendance at this little gathering.

Was weird and really awkward. And too cold for sunning or swimming anyways, although we tried. So we left after a short while. Later that night, after I submitted my paper, Billy came over and we eased out of the awkwardness and into the night.

He played songs on the guitar and wanted me to sing, which I happily did (and loudly). We played Osho Zen. We went outside and gawked at my crazy neighbors.

And then, in the afterglow of our union (ahem), there we were- laying on the livingroom floor bed that we've grown accustomed to making on those nights when my kids are sleeping upstairs, we talked about all sorts of things (mostly about SATs and college and science). He told me a story about a girl he 'knew' once. I assumed he meant that in the biblical sense of the word, but I was certain when he brought up the lab rats.

A whole year and a half ago, I felt self conscious about the idea of dating him because I happened to know that his ex was a neuroscientist (genius??). I felt like there is just something so hot about that much intelligence, and I stopped dead in my tracks.

Well, I agreed with him that any job that includes goggles and a lab coat is pretty much the greatest thing eva. And he told me a story about his ex giving little rats pap smears and then using the tiny guillotine.

I pondered aloud what it must DO to a person, to make a living like that.

He pondered aloud, back at me, that I should be asking what it DOESN'T do to you.

so... I hung out with the bf's twin sis last night

And it was great :-) She and her husband were just as cool as Bill had said (no, I take that back- they were even better). Their precious little cub was sleeping, even while we rocked out with some karaoke game for PlayStation, but she and I exchanged contact info and plan on getting the kids together sometime soon. And before we left there, plans were made to hangout with his parents sometime soon. HE WANTS ME TO MEET HIS PARENTS ? It was actually going to be today, but instead due to the drizzly cold weather, we dozed late into the day and are going to do it some other time.


It's ironic, considering that I had been thinking that maybe I had misunderstood how he felt about us, even though we've already 'defined the relationship' and both said that it's NOT just a casual thing, etc.

Well, Friday night, hanging out with Mike (the mutual friend who introduced us, but that I have a little bit of a casual history with) kind of set the stage for my paranoia. He asked what was new with me, and I gave the rundown; school and work are good, the kiddos are good, and things are good with 'Billy and I'... etc.

And then HE SAID: Oh, I didn't know you guys are dating! You guys are really a couple?

a few minutes later: Funny, Billy never mentioned that to me...

and then: Are you guys exclusive? Are you sure?

I brushed it off as nothing, and we had a fun night regardless, but later it crept up on me. Are we exclusive? Is he serious about me? Am I sure? I thought so, but Mike had gotten me all paranoid!

And then, yesterday, right in the midst of me pouring out these saaaaad, saaaad thoughts to Helen, Bill called and said he wanted me to meet his sister.

So there we are, having a crazy time at karaoke night, and a semi-alone moment presented itself for me to mention the stuff that Mike had brought up, and Billy suddenly grabbed me in this full-body-possibly-verging-on-humping-my-leg kind of hug and said "HELL YES, WE'RE EXCLUSIVE!! (then, with silly singing) You're my girl..." followed by some dangerously wonderful looks.

¿Que?

So, the next time I go to Colombia, I'll let you know if anything comes of this...

can we start a happy-meter for when I get somewhere on time?

I got to bio-lab in St. Pete very early today. So early I had time for breakfast in the gross little school cafe that was crawling with high schoolers, apparently.

I didn't get the full happy-meter bar, because I didn't have to get kids ready today, and I only got there so early because I didn't make coffee at home before I left.

it's (not yet) Thursday

Plato and a Platypus Walk Into a Bar..., by Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein, is, hands down, the best book I've read all year ;-)

No, seriously, it's funny. The comedic jewels are strewn hither and yon. Although it's a book of jokes, they tie everything up in a pretty way.

Take for example, this joke illustrating Western Empiricism:

"Three women are in a locker room dressing to play racquetball when a man runs through wearing nothing but a bag over his head. The first woman looks at his wiener and says, "Well, it's not my husband." The second woman says, "No, it isn't." The third says, "He's not even a member of this club."

Or this, the introduction to the section discussing logic and fallacies:

"The 'Post Hoc Ergo Propter Hoc' Fallacy

First, a word about the social usage of this term: In some circles, when uttered with a straight face, this phrase can help you get lucky at a party. Interestingly, it has the exact opposite effect when uttered in English."

Hee-larious, unlike the other two books I'm reading right now (Waterlily and The Origin of Financial Crises) and the one that I'm supposed to borrowing from Carvajal, asap. Right, John?

two things that make me wonder if the poles really are moving

Ok, so today was pretty interesting.

First day back to work since the holiday break started and I was in the new building. But no phones or computers have been hooked up yet, so no actual work can go on in there. Which is silly because ALL of the necessary paperwork and every last piece of the dept's office supplies are... IN THE NEW BUILDING.

So I unpacked boxes and moved things around somewhat.

As pretty as some parts of it are (skylights, floor to ceiling windows and stonework, great color scheme, fantastic tile work), the new building is like a comedy of errors, a glimmering, two story monstre sacre.

There are piles of construction debris throughout, electrical outlets that have no juice, doors that need repairs, and various little bits of unfinished business everywhere. How can classes start in 6 days? Really, I implore you.


Anyways, that's not even the stuff that registered on my radar as unusual:


1) Daniel (the really smart guy) stopped by and said hi while I was at work. I say this is unusual because it has never happened to me before, and was the last thing I expected to happen today. He has a nice smile, too.

And

2) I was solidly rear-ended tonight in Pinellas Park (as I brake for cyclists-even those who choose to rewrite traffic rules), but there is not a scratch on anybody.

woke up feeling practical, for my lab-practical..

..and it ended up being a non-practical exam anyways! LOL.

I should have known, seeing as I work in the dept and I know the labs/equipment are all packed up for the move (12 days to go).

So, the first of my 5 finals is done. Completed. Etc.

80% of it was really easy, so I'll guess and say I got a B? I had a 98% in lab, so... looks like an A for the semester.


Dr. Herod gave us our last test in Chem lecture last night, so next Monday we have the final. That means that tommorrow is the only day I have left to try and turn in HW. Think he's going to laugh at me? I haven't turned in a single HW all semester, and I'm going to try and give it all to him tommorrow... Then, on Monday, we do our final and that's it.

I missed my Trig class this morning, which BAD because I had a last test to do, but I think I can take it later today, if I beg, er, ask Dr. Geiger. The final will be next Tuesday morning. I am struggling to pull a C in this class, but it's not over yet.

I have a test in American History to make up still (def must be done before class tonight!), and a little paper on the Battle of Gettysburg due tonight also. The final for that class won't be until next Tuesday. I'm guessing I currently fall between an A and a B.

My Art History paper was finished last week, and I have an online final for that class that I can do on Thursday, at my leisure. Kinda nice. Plus I can still retake a few quizes, if I want to more firmly cement myself with an A.

It CLEARLY was an emergency

Have I ever told you my unofficial policy on voicemails? It's not very nice of me (gee, what is it with me posting things all catty and boastful-ish lately?) but I have good reasons.

No 1. Is it an emergency? Let me help you determine if it is an emergency... Blood? Car accident? ANYTHING involving my kids? I'll be generous and include running out of gas and needing help with pretty much anything I know how to do as "an emergency", but you need to say so in your voicemail.

No 2. Maybe not an emergency, but do you need to leave me fairly pertinant information; a phone number, meeting time, etc? This is obvious.

No 3. This is the one that gets me in trouble- are you the person I'm sleeping with? If so, you should know that your "Hey... call me back"s are nice, and sometimes your blips of rediculousness on my voicemail makes me laugh until I worry about peeing my pants. And it's always good to laugh.

So, to recap- Are you calling about an emergency/issue regarding my kids? Need to leave me a 10 sec bit of info? Keep a tootbrush at my house?

Ok, then. If we're not dealing with any of those situation, hang up the phone when you get my voicemail. I WILL call you back, I promise. ;-)

Abba Oil and the Angle of Death

My mom ran out of anointing oil from the Holy Land. Not 'The Holy Land' in Orlando, where you can walk through Bible stories and buy caps and tees emblazoned with Judeo-Christian slogans. I mean the Holy Land everyone fights about.

Anyways, that neither here nor there.

So, she ran out (PROBABLY BECAUSE SHE'S CONSTANTLY ANOINTING MY CHILDREN) and I did a "nice thing" and ordered her another little bottle.

We'll call it My Good Deed of the week.

After that, sadly, she and I had an argument that had nothing to do with religion and everything to do with me being capable to manage simple things in my life, and for my kids. I believe the real root of the fight was that I need exercise in order to feel like a real live human being, without it I feel awful, like I just want to lay around and feel sicker and deader.

So, tonight, I a long ride (9 miles), ad it gt me in the mood to apologize to her. But not before I had to leap into bushes from the bike. Yes, I leapt. Into bushes. Instead of dying (or probably just skinning my knees).

See, I picked up a lot of speed coming down Gulf to Bay from Hillcrest (which is at the top of a hill, of course). The sidewalk is great on that stretch of my route, until the Angle; 90 degrees and narrow AND bordered by a high curb. And at the bottom of a hill.

And do you know Ms. Mitchell, my chem lab prof WARNED me today that something bad might happen, after Greg and I were giggling, devilishly, about a psychological trial involving titration with burets holding ONLY WATER, Mwah HAHAHAAHAHA.

Can you tell I love titrating? And Greg, my upgrade-lab-partner, is color blind!

Well, the Angle of Death is what happened to me. Photo to come, if I can manage it tommorrow.

Flight of the Conchords? Oui, ca va?

We were rolling around laughing tonight, watching these New Zealander's performances and music videos on youtube.

I like their song Foux Du Fafa because it really does take me back to my first-year-French-class, but this other one had me in stitches.



Oh, and I decided that Bret (the hotter one) should totally be my boyfriend ;-) especially now that we know, well, what he's into...


Everything except the roommate bit, anyways, lol.