Friday, July 11, 2008

WELL stick me on a wheel and call me Hammy

I am in utter shock. Complete and utter shock. And not just because I finally did a complete Cow's Head posture at my yoga class the other day (and that would be "udder shock", right?). I mean, yes, that is amazing. I have been doing yoga for 12 years and this is a huge breakthrough (although I may have pulled a muscle...)

Anyways, I am in shock about something else.

You know how girls always complain that the guys they know want 'just one thing'? It's a total cliche for a reason, because it's largely true. [Or so I believed]

We believe that guys don't like relationships, that they don't want to sit and talk when there is literally no chance of something else happening... And what about the phenomena of men completely avoiding women after some sort of casual encounter, in which they were avidly participating? There are some guys who seem slightly more evolved by continuing contact for a few days, but it's really the same thing. [In defense of these women, I will say: they are not only after a relationship! Guys- some of these girls just want more of the, ahem, same. Some just want to be friends (with maybe more some of the time).]

And, so sometimes we girls play by their rules, putting up with it as long as it suits us. I know that's true for me, I like the fun I've had and i think I've learned to take it in stride... But, at the end of the day, what I really want is to be beside someone who wants to be beside ME (not just any hot girl who's willing).

Friendship and companionship inside of that kind of trust makes all the ruthless dating in the world seem really paltry, doesn't it?

And it's especially annoying to those of us who are single AND are also mothers to have this dating challenge to wrestle with... in addition to the ex's who will always be in our lives, bodies that have contorted (perhaps more than once?) with new life, and dinners to fix, child support checks that bounce... Ah, the joys.

But I apparently know a man who enjoys spending time with me when it is clear that NOTHING will ensue (ie: my children at home with me), beyond talking and laughing and some comfortable silences and some uncomfortable ones. There is certainly interest beyond those platonic pastures, but there is something really nice in just the scenery so far, too.

Clearly, I'm impressed by him, huh?

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