Sunday, December 28, 2008

in case you wanted a follow up on that thing (that I was embarrassed about)

So, a few days ago I went out with one of the people I had been chatting with from the (ugh) online dating site.

If you remember, I was originally a little freaked out by the stigma (despite the convenience of browsing), but that was quickly replaced with a sense of calm content demise.

Not in the worst possible sense, rather in the best way possible. Like, perhaps I am DESTINED to carry on for the next 80 years with no notable male companionship (assuming destiny of some sort exists)?

Or maybe I'm not completely uninteresting/unappealing and maybe there is someone out there who could appreciate me, etc (and now I'm assuming alot, perhaps)?

Doing the online dating thing seemed like a good way to attempt to prove either of those possibilities right/wrong. And, don't get me wrong, I have a kick ass plan for being unattached for the next 80 years if need be (including many adventures, and when I can no longer climb mountains and pitch tents, I could be living in a chic apartment in Paris with my old-maid-side-kick, Helen), so that's definately not some sort of tragedy.

OK, maybe none of this makes sense. Back to the story?


So, after half a semester of chatting with SmartGuy, we figured we should meet up before school picks up again, as he has the wicked habit of taking 18+ credit hours per semester (!!).

Dude, this guy talked anthropological CIRCLES around me. And he knows more about modern art, Nobel prize winners, current events, cooking, and scientific discoveries of the 16th century than he does about anthropology. A few years ago, he spent his time studying opera, then he got bored of that and got his CNA... he hopes to someday join Doctors Without Borders.

Oh, and for fun he does "guy stuff" like ride bikes and work on interesting projects around the house.

So, after tea, we went out for sushi (at Kiku, yep my favorite sushi spot), which is always fun. And, Nick Bollea (Hulk Hogan's son) sat next to me, oddly enough.


Here's the potentially most surreal part of the whole thing: this guy (30 yo) has never drank alcohol in his life. "Clean living..." is his motto.


Here's the caveat- I doubt he could really say much about me after that date... Well, maybe. I don't know. Maybe that's because there's not much to say?

He had manners, but I only really feel comfortable revealing personal information when an actual opportunity arises (like if someone asks me a question about myself), and eh, I don't know, I don't interrupt to brag about myself, I interrupt to add something to the discussion, or to disagree.

To say ANYTHING about myself, I have to feel like the other person is REALLY listening. I hate to have to repeat any of it down the road; I find talking about myself wholly unsavory and embarrassing. Except on my blog, where I do it to no (apparent) end.


SmartGuy: 4 out of 5 stars, we could definately be friends

me: feel like a dolt, hopefully this passes

5 comments:

Memarie Lane said...

That's pretty much how I felt after our homeschool play date a couple weeks ago.

uniheliodem said...

I tried the online dating thing, it didn't work so well for me.

I blame the tendency for people to lie when dating coupled with the ease of presenting lies when hiding behind a keyboard.

Perhaps I'm just a bit disillusioned with the whole thing after too many online dating disasters.

Gladis said...

Wow... disasters? I'll consider myself rather lucky, then.

uniheliodem said...

Maybe “disaster” is too strong of a word. I think that disappointment would be a better word. The details aren't so important, I have learned that trust is something that requires more than words to earn.

Anyway, I hope you have better luck.

I don't mind being a bachelor. I would like to find someone, but my life is fulfilling whether I am alone or not. Perhaps this is why I have found online dating to be so difficult.

To me, the goal of dating is really about starting or joining a family, and the criteria I use to judge a potential mate is based on this. I've sown my wild oats. The problem is that most of the women I have met online are not to that point yet.

Gladis said...

indeed